Grown Man Fighting All-Encompassing Urge to Click On Banner Ad Featuring Pikachu
Image courtesy of Mia Shapiro
April 8, 2016 – During his morning browsing for vital comic book movie news updates, local fully grown adult man Gregory Skiff came across a banner advertisement featuring no details apart from an image of beloved pocket monster Pikachu, and has since been fighting the unyielding urge to click on it and see what comes next.
“Pokémon was a big part of my childhood,” explained the now 32-year-old individual while continuing to stare at the conspicuous ad in wonderment. “I know it's now been decades since Gen 1, but I still come back to it every couple of years. You know, to relive those more innocent times. And possibly to finally catch that goddamn Mew.”
The man who is fully responsible for his own income, shelter and purchases further explained that he had encountered many similar ads in the past, some even featuring Squirtle, his favorite Pokémon. Clicking on those links had up until now only brought him disappointment, yet he continues to dream that this one may provide some manner of fulfillment.
“Odds are, it's one of those lousy Pokémon clones for your iPhone that doesn't even come close,” lamented Skiff, who at this point was seriously running the risk of being late for his full-time job. “Worse yet, the link might have nothing at all to do with Pokémon or gaming or my childhood. It could just be some dumb survey.
“It's all just smoke and mirrors. Or is it?”
When last observed, reporters say that Skiff had indeed chosen to click on the link, forcing him to then run a virus scan on his laptop, as well as getting written up once again for lateness at the H&M returns counter.
“Pokémon was a big part of my childhood,” explained the now 32-year-old individual while continuing to stare at the conspicuous ad in wonderment. “I know it's now been decades since Gen 1, but I still come back to it every couple of years. You know, to relive those more innocent times. And possibly to finally catch that goddamn Mew.”
The man who is fully responsible for his own income, shelter and purchases further explained that he had encountered many similar ads in the past, some even featuring Squirtle, his favorite Pokémon. Clicking on those links had up until now only brought him disappointment, yet he continues to dream that this one may provide some manner of fulfillment.
“Odds are, it's one of those lousy Pokémon clones for your iPhone that doesn't even come close,” lamented Skiff, who at this point was seriously running the risk of being late for his full-time job. “Worse yet, the link might have nothing at all to do with Pokémon or gaming or my childhood. It could just be some dumb survey.
“It's all just smoke and mirrors. Or is it?”
When last observed, reporters say that Skiff had indeed chosen to click on the link, forcing him to then run a virus scan on his laptop, as well as getting written up once again for lateness at the H&M returns counter.